Of Ninja and Circuitry
by Blue Tiger-chan
Summary: Uh... After a freak incident, Ino and Shikamaru get stuck in a television. After a few minutes so is everyone else. What happens when they have to...cosplay as random show icons! No flames. R and R Formerly The Television of Doom.
1. Introduction Part One

Uh… I have no idea whatsoever how this came into my mind. Actually I do. Well I was watching General Hospital one day, and I imagined this crazy randomness known as Fan Fiction. I'm just writing stuff down, and showing it off to the public domain.

Disclaimer-a-bob: I do not own Naruto, or any of the Television shows mentioned. I DO own the plot. And I own Murashi, Mikomi, and Hidomi, My own characters, as they will be appearing later. Okaaaaay? Okaaaaay.

Uh… I'm not going to stall anymore. Onward Ho!

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It was a lovely day in Konoha. Though poor Shikamaru had to stay inside. His parents decided that they needed a vacation, and being the super-responsible parents that they are, they left Shikamaru. But of course, he was a ninja. He could hold his own, and all that…important stuff. What he couldn't do is this… Keep being alone a secret. 'Well that's whack… I would tell EVERYONE I was alone.' That's what some of you are thinking, right? Well, if Ino gets a hold of the current information, she'll take over his house, and throw a large party. And when his parents unexpectedly/ironically return, he'll be left with the troublesome job of cleaning and taking INO'S blame. But nothing ever works out perfect like that, does it?

Shikamaru was on edge. Choji wanted to raid his pantry, because he actually ran out chips. And Ino wanted to play his State Of The Art video gaming system. He had reluctantly agreed.

And here he is, facing the question he currently feared.

"Hey, where'd your parents go to?"

"Uh…. they… Went to a… Carpet store…? Yeah. My parents think we need a new rug. Yeah."

"'Kay." Ino continued to beat up a defenseless alien, while Shika wiped his forehead.

Shikamaru sat down on his couch, watching Ino play video games.

Meanwhile Choji was in Shika's cabinet looking satisfied after he grabbed some chips. Then realization dawned. He went to far into Shika's cabinet. In short, he's stuck as a lion's head in a pickle jar. Awkward thought, isn't it?

"Ino! Shikamaru! Help me! Please…?" Choji shouted.

But poor Choji was unheard. By now Shikamaru and Ino were in a competitive battle of fictional video game characters.

"DIE!"

"I can't let that happen."

A mechanical voice sounded out. "Player One. Obliterated. You lose. Hah-hah. Player Two wins. Wahoo. (I need a new job.)"

"Ahh! That stupid game is rigged! You cheated! I demand a rematch!" Screamed Ino who kept jumping to conclusions.

"All you have to blame is yourself…accept defeat and don't be troublesome."

"Never! I will never accept…Aiyeeeeeeeeee!"

"Well, you know…Whaaaaaah!"

A big flash engulfed Shika's living room.

"Uh…. Ino…. Shikamaru? You there?"

No answer.

"I'm figuring this out!" Choji yanked himself out of the cabinet, causing random articles of food to fall out.

He walked out of the kitchen, and into Shikamaru's living room. There was no one there. He shrugged and turned on his television. And there was Shikamaru and Ino, looking like positive idiots.

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_A/N: Was it bad? Was it good? Did it crash and burn? Tell me! Review! _

B-T-C


	2. Introduction Part Two

I'm back, with another chapter! To help for later events… the table of television contents is in here.

Disclaimer-a-bob: Pig Latin! Aiyay ontday wonay Arutonay. Aiyay ODNAY wonay ymay wonay haracterscay, Urashimay, Ikomimay, and Idomihay. Yay Pig Latin! If anyone can cipher this, say what I wrote in normal English.

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Choji was dumbstruck. "Ino? Shikamaru? Are…are…are…you in the TV?"

"What does it look like?" Ino screeched.

"You're in…the TV?" Choji guessed.

"No DUH!" she shouted.

"I'll get you out! Shikamaru! Where's your remote?"

"On the television…I think."

Choji ran up to Shika's television and grabbed the remote and the TV Guide.

"Okay. I have the Remote. And…" He stared at the remote stupidly. There were at least eighty buttons on the remote.

"Who's the next smartest? Uh…Sasuke? Neji? Uh…I'll get them both!" He ran out of Shikamaru's house.

"Choji! Don't you dare leave…me…here…" Ino raged.

"Too late. We'll just have to wait." Shikamaru sighed.

On the couch, the TV Guide was spread open. The contents read.

_All Channels:_

_Channel One: The Blizzard Channel_

_Channel Two: The Jewelry Channel_

_Channel Five: Animal Channel_

_Channel Seven: Local News_

_Channel Ten: All Things Ten _(A/N: Uh…Lol?)

Channel Twelve: Anime Central 

_Channel Fifteen: Card Games Galore!_

_Channel Sixteen: Cooking Channel_

_Channel Twenty: CNN (Central Ninja Network)_

_Channel Twenty-Two: MTV _

_Channel Twenty-Three: Best-Outdated Movies Broadcasting (BOMB) _

_Channel Twenty-Four: Cars, Stars, and Bars (Hollywood gossip channel)_

_Channel Twenty-Five: Discovery Channel_

_Channel Twenty-Seven: Soap Operas Unlimited_

_Channel Twenty-Nine: The Manly-Man Network_

_Channel Thirty: Girly-Girl Channel_

Channel Thirty-One: Cartoon Network 

The list went on and on, but Shikamaru couldn't read anymore.

Just then, Choji burst back into the house with Sasuke, Neji, Lee, Tenten, Sakura, and Naruto.

"WHAT HAPPENED!" Naruto shouted.

"Shut up already!" Sakura hit him on the head.

"Well…" Choji started

"We're in Shikamaru's Television! Get me out!"

Tenten and Neji, the closest ones to the TV jumped five feet. Well, Tenten did. Neji just had a "Holy Crud?" face.

"We are in this TV, and I for some reason, have no idea how to get out. And it's troublesome in this television." Shikamaru stated.

"I see." Sasuke looked slightly intrigued at the fact that the smartest person he knows (Besides himself) sunk as low as getting stuck in an inanimate object.

"We can talk about it. I'll get some snacks!" Choji ran into Shikamaru's kitchen and brought out some chips. 'Only one bag? I'll need some more.' He went to look into Shikamaru's cabinet. "The chips!" _Yank. _"Oh Fuzz…" _Yank. Yank. Yank._ "HELP! Anybody!"

In the living room 

"You here anything?" Lee asked.

"Nope." Naruto said.

"Hmm… I thought I did but, oh well!" Lee said.

FLASH! 

"Oh no! Not again!" Choji finally managed to pull himself out of the cabinet. But to his horror and dismay, everyone else was in the TV too.

"NOT YOU GUYS TOO!" Choji cried.

He proceeded to bang his head on the floor.

"I'll have to get Shino. He'll know what to do. I hope." He ran out of Shikamaru's house, again, to get Hinata, Shino, and Kiba.

"Don't leave me here with the Human Icebox! And the Human Icebox…who has the hots for Tenten!" Ino shouted.

"What?" Tenten and Neji spat.

"Erhm… Nothing? Hee-hee…" Ino slipped near Sakura.

"It'd better be nothing." Tenten spat, while Neji just looked at Ino with disgust.

After about ten minutes, Choji came running out of breath with Shino, Hinata, Kiba and Akamaru.

"What happened?" Shino asked monotonously.

"Everyone got stuck in the television! Except for me!" Choji screamed.

"Choji…are you okay?" Kiba asked. Akamaru barked.

"Of course! I'll show you!" Choji was going into hysterics.

"Hey Shino!" Naruto shouted.

Shino stared. Whether he was shocked, surprised, or unfazed, is a mystery.

"Ohh…Kay…" Kiba stared.

Hinata said nothing.

"We'll have to watch out for the big flash thing!" Choji looked around.

"Big?" Hinata asked.

"Flash?" Shino added.

"Thing?" Kiba finished.

"Bark?" Akamaru looked confused.

"Yes! The big-."

FLASH! 

"Crud!"

"Well, now that we're all stuck in a television. What DO we do?" Asked Sasuke.

"We mess up the channels! Duh!" Naruto said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"No. We try and get out. And…" Neji started.

FLASH! 

"That's it. We're figuring out why there are all these flashes!" Sakura said.

"Alright." Everyone reluctantly agreed.

They split up and walked around the…Television. At last they found something. A big hole.

"Let's go inside!" Naruto ran inside.

"We're just going to find him aren't we?" Sakura asked.

"Yeah." Ino said.

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You know the drill. Read, Review, Make the world happy, Stop world hunger…the likes.

And yes! The television shows will be incorporated into the story, NEXT CHAPTER! Remember. Reviews make Tiger-chan happy! So Review! NOW! Grr…

B-T-C


	3. All Things Ten, Animal Channel, The News

Oh-my-Kitty-Dragon! Thanks for all the reviews! COOKIES FOR EVERYONE WHO REVIEWED! And for everyone else, NO COOKIES FOR YOU! Okay, now that I'm done with my reverie, let's continue! Warning: Some of the characters may be OOC this chapter.

Disclaimer-a-bob: Ugga, ugga. Blue. No own Naruto. Me caveman! Grunt. Sniff.

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Chapter Three: Animal Channel, All Things Ten, And The Local News

"GET NARUTO! CHARGE!" Kiba bellowed.

A voice rang in the far distance, "You'll never catch me! I'm the Gingerbread Man! Ha-ha!"

Everyone stopped and stared at Naruto's running figure.

"Naruto's an idiot." Sakura sighed.

"Yes Sakura, but he's _our_ idiot." Sasuke looked at her.

"Yeah. I guess so. Where were we? Oh yeah, GET HIM!" Ino shouted.

"Wait guys. My Big Flash Senses are tingling!" Shino said.

"What?"

_FLASH!_

_In the Animal Channel_

"Oh…that's what he meant." Kiba said.

"I'm right here." Shino stared at Kiba. (A/N: People like to stare in this story, don't you think?)

"So! You two are our final two contestants!" A man in khakis and a Hawaiian shirt with flowers on it came up to Kiba and Shino.

"Huh?" Kiba looked around at eight other people.

"…" Shino looked around.

"Are you ready?" The man with the shirt on was Kiba's left side.

"For the most adventurous week of your…" He was on Shino's left.

"LIFE!?" He was in the middle of Shino and Kiba, which scared them because they were looking to their sides.

'_I hate this man already.' _Both Kiba and Shino thought.

"I'm Alex Razzentazzle! Host of the hit show, I Want To Become An Animal Show Host!" Alex shouted into a microphone.

Shino and Kiba stood next to a girl with blond hair. She turned around to give the two contestants some nasty trash talk. But what she did was squeal.

"Oh my gosh! It's Kiba and Shino!" She shouted.

"You know her?" Kiba asked.

"No. You know her?" Shino asked.

"No…" Kiba answered.

"…. FANGIRLS!" They screamed.

"KIBA AND SHINO! ATTACK MY MINIONS! AIYEE!" Blondie shouted.

About twenty girls started chasing poor Shino and Kiba.

In a Galaxy Two Channels Away… 

Shikamaru and Ino ended up on a set of a news show.

"You two! You must the replacements for Anderson Cooper and Paula Zahn!" A lady who must have had fifteen plastic surgeries ran up to them.

"Err… Okay?" Ino said as she was whisked away to get make-up put on.

"You! Sit at the fancy News desk." Another man said to Shikamaru.

"Okay…" He sat down slowly in a blue Rollie-Spinney-chair. The other chair was purple.

Out of nowhere, Ino was pushed out of a room and fell into the chair.

"We're on in…Three… Two…One…Now!"

A medley of cheap news music played.

"Uh… Welcome to today's edition of… Konoha News? Yeah, we'll go with that."

"I'm Yamanaka Ino!"

"And I'm Nara Shikamaru…"

"Today's top headlines are… Ramen sales have dropped substantially."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" A voice sounded.

"It's Naruto! Get him!" Ino jumped onto the table and jumped after Naruto.

"Err… I guess that's the news… Peace Out…" Shikamaru got out of the chair, pushed it in, and walked after Ino and Naruto.

At the All things Ten channel… 

Tenten and Neji stood there. Just standing there. Until a short midget man came up to them and said, "You two state your names."

"Hyuga Neji…"

"I'm Tenten…Waaaah!" the short man picked Tenten up.

"Almighty Tenten! Your arrival was foretold in the Prophecy!

"Huh?" She managed to say.

"The Prophecy states; _there shall be a young maiden, of the name Tenten. She will be accompanied by a person with no pupils and will fall madly in love with him. On the fourth moon of the year 8723, He and she will become rulers of our humble country, Tetramilga! Our country's famine will end, the rivers will flow, and we will get a better wardrobe. Huzzah! Huzzah! Quota the Ten Gods! More specifically, the Tenth God, Blue Kirdragon! _Ha-ha-ha-ha! Therefore you two shall come with me! Torsu, the medicine man!"

"I'm thinking you got the wrong Tenten." Tenten said.

"I'm thinking you've gotten the wrong… Pupiless-person." Neji said.

"Sorry kids, blame your destiny." Torsu said.

"Hey! I'm the one who annoys other people with destiny! Not you!" Neji said.

"Too bad, Mr. Girly-Hair!" Torsu spat.

Neji was aghast.

"Sorry Neji, but you just got served!" Tenten laughed.

"Take me to my people, Torsu!" Tenten sighed dreamily, as if she knew what the prophecy was even about.

"You too… Mr. Girly-Hair…" Tenten said before walking away with Torsu.

Neji seethed and walked after the two, looking for the nearest living thing (or Hinata) to beat up.

Back at the Animal Channel… 

"Waaaaaaaiiiiit!" Alex Razzentazzle screamed. They all stopped. …Just kidding! They kept running, and ran over Mr. Razzentazzle.

"Aye… My pelvis… Aye…" Alex moaned.

"Uh… Sorry Mr.…Azzenfazzle?" Kiba shouted at the heap on the ground known as, Alex Razzentazzle.

"No Kiba, it was (pant) Mr.…Zazzenmuffle!" Shino said.

"Was not!" Kiba argued, running a little faster.

"I'm pretty sure it was Zazzenmuffle! (Pant)" Shino retorted.

"Azzenfazzle, Shino, Azzenfazzle!" Kiba shouted back.

"Kiba. Trust me it was Zazzenmuffle." Shino said.

"Shino! Don't be stupid! The right name is… NARUTO!" Kiba bounded after Naruto, Ino, and (lagging behind) Shikamaru.

Akamaru barked and came after Kiba. (A/N: Yes! Akamaru was there the whole time.)

Shino sighed. "I still think it was Zazzenmuffle…" He said in a quiet voice. He ran after Naruto, Ino, Shikamaru, Kiba, and Akamaru.

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(A/N: Yay! Another chapter done! Please review! It makes me happy! Oh so happy! Thanks so much for reading and stuff.)

-BT-C


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